Skip Nav

10 Great Opening Lines from Stanford Admissions Essays

Telling Your Story to Colleges

❶Always available if you need to communicate with him.

OUR AREAS OF INTEREST

Choose Your Test
I need help starting my college essay
How it works

I have old hands. What are "old" hands? How has having these hands affected the author? There was no possibility of taking a walk that day. Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre. Who wanted to go for a walk? And why was this person being prevented from going? Look at how much specificity this sentence packs in less than 20 words. Each noun and adjective is chosen for its ability to convey yet another detail. Maybe it's because I live in Rhinelander, Wisconsin, where Brett Favre draws more of a crowd on Sunday than any religious service, cheese is a staple food, it's sub-zero during global warming, current "fashions" come three years after they've hit it big with the rest of the world, and where all children by the age of ten can use a gauge like it's their job.

Riley Smith '12 for Hamilton College. This sentence manages to hit every stereotype about Wisconsin held by outsiders—football, cheese, polar winters, backwardness, and guns—and this piling on gives us a good sense of place while also creating enough hyperbole to be funny.

At the same time, the sentence raises the tantalizing question: High, high above the North Pole, on the first day of , two professors of English Literature approached each other at a combined velocity of miles per hour. David Lodge, Changing Places. To avoid falling into generalities with this one, make sure you're really creating an argument or debate with your counterintuitive sentence. If string theory is really true, then the entire world is made up of strings, and I cannot tie a single one.

This sentence hints that the rest of the essay will continue playing with linked, albeit not typically connected, concepts. In just six words, this sentence upends everything we think we know about what happens to human beings. Is this person about to declare herself to be totally selfish and uncaring about the less fortunate?

We want to know the story that would lead someone to this kind of conclusion. So many amazing details here. Why is the Colonel being executed? What does "discovering" ice entail? How does he go from ice-discoverer to military commander of some sort to someone condemned to capital punishment? To work well, your question should be especially specific, come out of left field, or pose a surprising hypothetical. How does an agnostic Jew living in the Diaspora connect to Israel? This is a thorny opening, raising questions about the difference between being an ethnic Jew and practicing the religion of Judaism, and the obligations of Jews who live outside of Israel to those who live in Israel and vice versa.

There's a lot of meat to this question, setting up a philosophically interesting, politically important, and personally meaningful essay. While traveling through the daily path of life, have you ever stumbled upon a hidden pocket of the universe? The lesson you learned should be slightly surprising not necessarily intuitive and something that someone else might disagree with. Perhaps it wasn't wise to chew and swallow a handful of sand the day I was given my first sandbox, but it seemed like a good idea at the time.

The reader wants to know more. All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina. Did he draw the right conclusion here? How did he come to this realization? And let your first sentences soar like the Wright Brothers' first airplane! This is the place in your essay where you go from small to big—from the life experience you describe in detail to the bigger point this experience illustrates about your world and yourself.

Typically, the pivot sentence will come at the end of your introductory section, about halfway through the essay. I say sentence, but this section could be more than one sentence though ideally no longer than two or three. So how do you make the turn? This is called signposting, and it's a great way to keep readers updated on where they are in the flow of the essay and your argument.

Here are three ways to do this, with real-life examples from college essays published by colleges. In this pivot, you gesture out from the specific experience you describe to the overarching realization you had during it. Think of helper phrases such as "that was the moment I realized" and "never again would I. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. I actually succeeded in springing it. Stephen '19 for Johns Hopkins University. This is a pretty great pivot, neatly connecting the story Stephen's been telling about having to break into a car on a volunteering trip and his general reliance on his own resourcefulness and ability to roll with whatever life throws at him.

It's a double bonus that he accomplishes the pivot with a play on the word "click," which here means both the literal clicking of the car door latch and the figurative clicking his brain does.

But in that moment I realized that the self-deprecating jokes were there for a reason. When attempting to climb the mountain of comedic success, I didn't just fall and then continue on my journey, but I fell so many times that I befriended the ground and realized that the middle of the metaphorical mountain made for a better campsite. Not because I had let my failures get the best of me, but because I had learned to make the best of my failures.

Rachel Schwartzbaum '19 for Connecticut College. This pivot similarly focuses on a "that moment" of illuminated clarity. In this case, it broadens Rachel's experience of stage fright before her standup comedy sets to the way she has more generally not allowed failures to stop her progress—and has instead been able to use them as learning experiences. Not only does she describe her humor as "self-deprecating," but she also demonstrates what she means with that great "befriended the ground" line.

It was on this first educational assignment that I realized how much could be accomplished through an animal education program—more, in some cases, than the aggregate efforts of all of the rehabilitators. I found that I had been naive in my assumption that most people knew as much about wildlife as I did, and that they shared my respect for animals.

Maloney '07 for Hamilton College. This is another classically constructed pivot, as J. The widening of scope happens at once as we go from a highly specific "first educational assignment" to the more general realization that "much" could be accomplished through these kinds of programs. In this pivot, you draw a parallel between the life event that you've been describing in your very short story and other events that were similar in some significant way.

This state of discovery is something I strive for on a daily basis. My goal is to make all the ideas in my mind fit together like the gears of a Swiss watch. Whether it's learning a new concept in linear algebra, talking to someone about a programming problem, or simply zoning out while I read, there is always some part of my day that pushes me towards this place of cohesion: Aubrey Anderson '19 for Tufts University.

After cataloging and detailing the many interesting thoughts that flow through her brain in a specific hour, Aubrey uses the pivot to explain that this is what every waking hour is like for her "on a daily basis. And her pivot lets us know that her example is a demonstration of how her mind works generally. Our return brought so much back for me. I will be proof reading the answers as well for my mindset in order me to get the best grade possible , but I will hope majority of the questions are answered correctly by you writer.

Take care, have a great holiday! Coursework, Marketing, 2 pages. Other, Geography, 3 pages. Her patience is everything and her willing to satisfy her client is her goal, her work is excellent and has managed to finish it before the due date, Excellent work! Argumentative Essay, Anthropology, 3 pages. Provides an excellent analysis on the subject of the custom paper. Meets all criteria of the paper. Provides paper DAYS before the deadline Critical Thinking, Management, 3 pages.

This is the second paper Meghan has completed and once again, another amazing paper. For any papers needing to be generated for the rest of my school career until graduation, Meghan will be my number one choice.

Research Paper, Finance, 5 pages. Made an A on my essay paper. Professor is very knowledgeable. Always available if you need to communicate with him. Essay Any Type , English, 5 pages. Many of students have had to seek for writing help in the past, and we at EduBirdie understand how difficult that can be. Whether you are a student seeking for tutor assistance for an academic assignment or a business professional who needs help for a general research paper we have professionals who can handle it.

Everything we complete is free of grammatical errors. We also ensure that the content will be unique and tailored according to your instructions. Here are a few of the services we offer:. Many of our competitors simply ask for a list of instructions for your topic, assign you the essay helper, and then give you the completed product with little communication between you and writer and the client.

They expect you to trust that everything will turn out the way you want in the end. We find this to be problematic. Without maintaining a dialogue with the client throughout the paper help process, these writing services cannot guarantee that the essay received will be what you expect or paid for.

You can talk to a pool of potential applicants before hiring anyone. If you are not satisfied, you do not pay for uncompleted writing. Plagiarism is never acceptable in any circumstance. We ensure that all sources will be properly cited and everything you receive will be uniquely generated. For example, if you're writing an essay with the following thesis statement: Once you've hooked your readers and stated your main points, all you have to do is state your thesis.

It tends to work best as the last sentence in the introductory paragraph, though sometimes the essay can be successful if you place the thesis earlier in the introduction. The introductory paragraph and the thesis should work like a road map to the rest of the essay, so that the reader knows what to expect in the rest of the paper. To recap, a successful start to a college essay, or an introductory paragraph, should include the following: A "hook" to get the reader's attention A brief discussion of the main points that will be covered in the body of the essay The thesis statement.

Write body paragraphs. Once you've found your thesis statement and have written that introductory paragraph, much of the hard work of the essay is over. Now, you'll have to jump into the body paragraphs that will develop the main points you've made in your thesis statement, and which will help inform or persuade your readers. You should have body paragraphs or more, depending on the length of the essay.

Each body paragraph should include the following: Supporting details, evidence, facts, or statistics that develop the main point. A concluding sentence that wraps up the ideas in the paragraph and transitions to the next body paragraph. Once you have your introduction and your three body paragraphs, you should write a conclusion that wraps up the ideas you've introduced and explained in your essay.

The conclusion should do several things: Remember to stick to the third person. Writing in the third person unless you're told not to do so is a very important aspect of writing a successful college essay. You should never say "I think Instead of saying, "I think abortion should remain legal in the United States," you can say, "Abortion should remain legal in the United States," to make your argument sound more forceful.

You should avoid the first and the second person. Don't say "you" -- say "one," "he or she," or use the appropriate pronoun. Instead of saying, "You should spend hours a week if you want to succeed in college," say, "College students should spend hours a week studying if they want to succeed.

Once you've written your rough draft, you should go back and revise the essay and check for any lapses in your logic, and unproved points, or any weak arguments. You may also find that not everything in the essay is relevant, that your ideas are repetitive, and that you may need to tweak your thesis a bit -- that's only natural. Once you feel that the essay is solid, you can revise it for grammar and punctuation. You should start by writing an introduction, followed by your main paragraph.

Finally you should write an argument paragraph followed by a conclusion. Not Helpful 0 Helpful 6. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. Already answered Not a question Bad question Other.

Quick Summary To start a college essay, kick off your introduction with a hook that will draw your readers in, like a rhetorical question, a shocking statistic, or a personal anecdote.

Did this summary help you? Tips If you want to have a good college essay you should work very carefully. Plan your work, make several drafts and only then you will get your A.

You should write your ideas in a logical way. Remember, the main aim of your essay is to catch the attention of the reader. That means leave your audience with the final word. Essay Introductions In other languages: Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read , times. Did this article help you?

I need help starting my essay

Main Topics

Privacy Policy

Wondering how to start a personal statement for college? This guide will walk you through crafting the perfect introduction, including examples. How to Start a College Essay Perfectly. Posted by Dr. Anna Wulick | May 4, Have friends who also need help with test prep? Share this article!

Privacy FAQs

Need Help With Your College Application Essays? Ask the Experts advice for creating a great college essay. Start with a grabber of an opening line. for facial and body language to identify.

About Our Ads

Help with my essay for college. I need help starting my essay. There a talk placing a brass mark the spot where lies that great and unhappy king whose reign will for ever remembered the Battle the Standard. The Induction Balance and President Garfield's Wound, T M a practical man I don't care for your theories, I judge X results. I need help starting my college essay, top rated essay writing service, best college essay service | Complete set of services for students of all levels including academic writing, editing and proofreading with excelent quality at low prices. We provide result with attention to individual requirements for content and your deadlines.

Cookie Info

Your essay can give admission officers a sense of who you are, as well as showcasing your writing skills. Try these tips to craft your college application essay. I need help. I don t know how to start my college essay. For the common application personal essay I chose.